They said no?

What a day oh what a day.

I fell asleep fearing I would wake up with a sore throat and sure enough that's exactly what happened. Luckily I was able to sleep in because I didn't have classes until 10:30 but unfortunately the pain in my throat woke me up much earlier than I wanted. But it was sunny so I figured things were going to be great!

Until I got to school.

My first class was fine. It was 10th grade and they had a test on Friday so today I gave them a chance to earn some points back by correcting their exams for 1/2 credit in return. Yahoo! Incentive to learn! Then there was a 20 minute break. I went upstairs to check up on the progress of the reparations on the 3rd floor from over the weekend. I didn't have much time to look before I saw four 2nd form girls. I told them they needed to go downstairs. They said, "no". Ok, well, if they weren't going to go downstairs without me I decided to look at the progress another time and go downstairs with them. They started running, giggling, and looking back at me as if I was chasing them. (Insert confused look here???). Halfway down the stairs they stopped. I told them to go upstairs when I really meant to say downstairs (ooooh opposites!!). They then took advantage of my weak Romanian and said they were going upstairs because I told them it was ok. I didn't let them pass. This went back-and-forth a few times before they finally ended up downstairs. Next thing I knew, one of the girls had come up to me saying there was a girl upstairs. I went up there and didn't find her so went and photographed a room. Then I heard her- and the same girl that told me the other one was up there- and they were hiding under a poorly stacked pile of desks. Obviously that's not safe (nor is being up there). They told me they wouldn't come out. Finally they did- and I followed (or chased them, as they seemed to think) back downstairs. Again. I ended up "cornering" one of the girls who had tried to hide under the stairs. I told her she needed to come with me to speak to the principal, as did the others but I knew I'd never be able to take them without physical force and clearly that was not an option. This started drawing a crowd as I waited for her and she kept saying no, which made it even that more difficult.

The bell rang and the kids skedattled to their classrooms and she began to cry saying she just wanted to go to class because if she was late she was going to get in trouble. I tried to convince her that I would go with her to class so she wouldn't get in trouble from that teacher but I was still going to talk to the Principal. She gave me the names of the other girls and then I let her to go class alone.

I was supposed to be teaching at this time, but I will be honest- I was pretty upset about this. What upset me most was the flat out disrespect of the girls toward me. I mean, they flat out said,"no". And then there's the fact that they were running from me as if we were playing a game of chase. Sure, I do this with kids I'm babysitting around their house. But that is clearly a game- and this was not even close. I felt so disrespected that I broke down. The only time I've been more hurt by the way a child treated me was once when I was babysitting and this kid was screaming at me with so much hate in his eyes because I told him to go to his room. Yes, I do know I shouldn't have let this get to me. But it did.

So I walked outside and called Nina, my project director. I really didn't know what I should have done or what I should do now. I had yet to speak to the Principal about the issue and wasn't sure if that was the best option. She talked me through the situation and told me next time if they say no once, then just go straight to the Principal and let her know so then she can handle the situation. Ok, great. Noted. Then she something that I really didn't want to hear, but in this culture, I think she (and my partner teachers) are right: I need to stop being so friendly with the students. BAM! That hurts. It's not in my nature or in my personality to know how to be un-friendly with kids. I feel like there's always been a line between me (the older person who is in charge) and the kids. But that respect just doesn't exist here. Teachers have to show the kids who is boss and there can't be a fine line... either you're their friend or you're their teacher. Unfortunately I tried too hard to be the friend (subconsciously), and now I have to turn that around and be the teacher. Then, once they begin to respect me and listen to me, then I can lighten up a bit.

So much for not giving up my smile... it's going to go hibernate for awhile.

But, you know, this is another problem with the kids here. Not too long ago they were beat so they would listen, do their homework, and study. In fact, some teachers were talking last week that in the kindergarten classes that is happening right now- and they were totally not okay with it and were deciding how to approach it because they kids were coming to first grade afraid of being hit but at the same time without any knowledge of anything. Not that I would ever be okay with hitting a child, but why did this work in the past? In one room schoolhouses in America, for example, how is it that students actually learned something in school and did it have to do with the punishment? Schools here just don't have any form of discipline... and kiddos don't care if they get good marks or not because their parents are out of the country and the grandparents don't care (this was said to me by a student). They have no desire to learn because they have no consequence of not learning, nor can they see a future for themselves where knowledge is important. Somehow I need to show that that it is important to learn not just for good marks but for their future.

If I could go back and re-do my education, I would have studied and I would have tried to learn the information instead of memorizing it the night before a test. I've learned there is a reason we go to school and we are taught what we're taught (ok, maybe no all subjects... but most of them).

Ahhh I just want to help but I feel like I'm doing nothing!!

... but at least it's 60º and sunny today!

First Date

Ross and I had our first date this weekend.

I'm sure you're probably saying, "But, Cate! H

ow is this possible? You've been dating for 3 months!" Well, let me tell you.

Being a Peace Corps Volunteer in Moldova- and being so far from the capital- doesn't really make it easy to go on a real date, especially when in the villages. There aren't restaurants for us to go to for dinner, no one is really out after dark, and our host moms are really good at cooking us dinner. So, because of this, there is no need/ability to go out for dinner.

Usually when we are in Chisinau we rent an apartment with a group of friends which makes our stay much cheaper and rather fun since we try to squeeze as many people in to one small apartment as we can. But, due to a certain conversation with some other volunteers, I decided I would much prefer an apartment that I know will be super squeaky clean.

We called around but there weren't too many vacancies due to the National Wine Fest. We finally found a place: http://en.villanatali.com/. I highly recommend it if you happen to venture to Chisinau. They are known for having a very clean reputation, the stay is SO friendly and helpful, and breakfast is included in the rate!

After getting checked in we went on a walk to try to find some dinner. We ended up at Zen Sushi- which is a sushi place with a different colored plates being equivalent to different prices. The food was surprisingly good (and I trusted the fish!!) and it was so metro. I didn't feel like I was in Moldova at all- and then we went to a corner cafe with French and Italian desserts and pastries and, once again, I felt as though I was outside of Moldova. Then when we got back to the hotel we adjustable heating- oh the things we take for granted in America!

It was quite an expensive weekend but it was such a wonderful get-away after being so frustrated with my students and the results on their tests. Maybe we don't need to go to Paris for New Years Eve... just kidding. It's still a necessity. :)

Rough

Sometimes it really is rough being here and being a teacher. I feel really defeated at times, especially after I give a test. I'm often torn between being super nice or super strict. I mean, am I here so the students learn English, or am I here so they learn that cheating is not okay, or am I here for something else entirely. I really have no idea. I wish someone would just put a banner in my face at times that says, "CATE! YOU ARE HERE BECAUSE...!!!!!!!!!!!" Unfortunately that is never going to happen.

In case you forgot, my 8th form class is the only class I am teaching by myself. I really do love that class especially because I get to do everything exactly how I want to do it (although sometimes that is difficult because I'm still learning to be a teacher, but I guess I'll always be learning?!). Anyways, in order to review for the test that my students had on Friday, we played Jeopardy one day with the vocabulary words and then I spend another full lesson reviewing the grammar from the entire unit. Since I gave them two extra class periods (which was over a 5 day span) to do their homework of taking 2 of the vocabulary words from the unit and making a visual/giving the translation in romanian/using them in a sentence- and they still failed to do it- I told them the test would be very heavy on vocabulary, so they best get to studying to exact words I gave them in the Jeopardy game. Yet somehow that still didn't do any good because only one student knew most of the words. I was a stickler on the cheating during the test (one girl had the vocab written in a notebook she'd put in the pouch of her sweater and was looking through it- literally right in front of me)... others were talking... oh boy. I ended up taking 4 tests away before the class was done because I was tired of them cheating. Of course that backfired because those students kept talking about every 30 seconds to ask me for their test back which was a disruption to the class. Next time I think I'm going to try the "big black marker" which was taught to me by a fellow volunteer: when they cheat, I walk around and put a big, black, 2 on their test paper and that is what they will receive on their test. She claims it works with her students and they no longer cheat. We'll see what happens...

But, due to all of this, it's still quite frustrating for me. I mean, here I am, trying my best to teach them English- give them the most important and active vocabulary from the unit, and even give them the answers- and they still don't take the time to memorize it. They one student I have been so happy with because she wants to learn clearly doesn't because she was cheating, too.

What do I do here?

PS

Sorry for the vent.

BRRR

It is officially becoming winter here in Moldova. I think Mother Nature forgot about fall... the leaves, however, are pretty shades of yellow and orange in some locations. I need to go on another photo walk! I just don't feel prepared at all for this winter... but I thought I had plenty of great (and correct) freezing temperature layers. Which, actually, I do. As long as I'm walking. But when I'm just sitting/standing still I'm freezing! Any ideas on how to fix that? I wish I'd brought a sleeping bag but decided against it because when figuring out what to pack someone had said they brought one and haven't even touched it and the mama gazda's hook you up with so many blankets that you're set. Well, I have 1 and I'd prefer 100 more... at least while I'm falling asleep because once I'm asleep it's fine. But what about when I'm sitting at my computer? SO cold!

It is, however, soba season. The soba is this ceramic or brick oven-ish wall where you put wood in it and light a fire for 30 mins or 1 hour and the room will be warm for hours- as long as you keep your door closed so the heat can't escape. My NMG (new mama gazda, aka host mom) apparently "turned on" the soba yesterday morning before she went to work in the field. When I came home at 7pm (after being gone all day- that story will come later), my room was warm and I thought she'd just lit the fire. Nope! Almost 12 hours earlier... but then I tried to ask them if they could light another one for the night/morning. The answer was no because:

1. Was I cold at that moment? No.

2. Was I cold last night? No.

3. Do I want 7 months of winter? No.

I guess that means I'll only be warm sometimes. But that's ok. I mean, it's only 39ºF right now. It's going to get SO much colder...

Cold or wet?

It's getting cold enough that it takes 3 days for the clothes outside to try. The problem, however, is this- I can't tell if my clothes are just cold or if they're still wet (and, when it rains between the time of washing them and them being dry, that makes things even more difficult).

OOooh winter, you're making me NERVOUS!!!!

Prieten vs Prietenul

What a bonding dinner with the family. I'd spent all day in Balti with Kim, Mandy, and Chris- just to get away for awhile. It was absolutely wonderful. But, after not being able to fall asleep the night before and so therefore only getting 5 hours of sleep, I was quite tired. Then, to top it off, I'd been speaking English all day, so I knew the switch to Romanian at dinner would be difficult.

And it was. But it sure made for a funny story!!

I told my host family that I've decided on Paris for winter break. I know I've been there a million times in the past, but Mandy is going, I have a lot of friends I want to see, and it will be cold so it will be nice to relax for a week instead of going somewhere new to "sight see" in the cold.

My NTG was doing his normal "woe is me, life can't be happy, everything is expensive" thing. I kind of felt like he was trying to make me feel guilty for wanting to go to Paris. Oh well. It happens. Regardless, I counteracted that comment by telling him that I have many friends "prietenii" there, so it will be cheaper (ie places to stay, even though we're really going to get a hotel). He thought I said "prietenul" (which means boyfriend), so he thought I was saying I have a boyfriend there so things will be cheaper. Of course this poses a problem considering Ross is my boyfriend, and he'd just finished telling me how he doesn't like people from Turkey because they have many wives. I was so confused as to why he was so serious about this matter of me going to Paris to see my friends- and then my host mom burst out laughing (vocabulary phrase for my 8th formers!) and explained the miscommunication error. That got all 3 of us laughing together- for the first time.

Then my NMG was saying how she wants to go to Paris with me (I really beginning to see her soft side and that she does like me). I told her I'll put her in my suitcase. NTG, being how he is, told me that wouldn't work because her back would hurt, and they wouldn't let her go through because they have to scan the bags or something. That's when my host mom looks at him straight in the eye- very serious- and says, "she's joking". Laughing session #2!

Then NMG said she is ready to go to Paris now. I said ok, tomorrow. 8am. And she said no, 7 am. I said perfect. We will go to Paris tomorrow at 7. And she said, yes, Paris, the "dial" (field). Laughing session #3!

These are probably all "you had to be there" moments, but I thought I'd share them with you. Within the last few days things have really started to turn around with my host family. I really don't know if it's something that has changed in my head so I am finally seeing this side of them, or if they are changing somehow. Regardless, I'm not complaining. I like how things are getting better- especially with this cold weather that is quickly approaching!

It's getting to be in the 30's at night... I'm so afraid that I'm not ready for this.

Bonding?

Yesterday was one for the record books. I would havemade this post last night (like I wanted to) but my internet wasn't working. Go figure. On Monday that is all going to change because one of my students is going to help me get a new internet stick that actually has coverage here in the area. For 150 lei a month you get 5GB of downloads. After the 5GB are used up it goes to a slower speed. When he brought over the stick yesterday to test it out the 5GB were used up, yet the webpages were still loading literally in a blink of an eye. No, I'm not joking. Skype will be up and running next week! And more pictures will be posted! YES!

Bad news:

I got told I smile too much? Sup

posedly my students think that I think everything (good and bad) they do is OK because I am always smiling. And I shouldn't be too friendly with them in the halls because they get the wrong idea? I guess I don't fully understand this... but I can't help how much I smile. I'm happy and the kids make me happy. Maybe I need to put on a "tough gal" face more often... but that's hard when they aren't really don't anything that bad... usually :P

Good news 1!!!!!!

After teaching my 8th form class one of my students (the one I got so excited about because she was remembering the vocabulary words when we did a very kinesthetic exercise) came up to me. She had come to the not-really-a-club English Club but had to leave halfway through because of something or another (it wasn't her choice). So, she came up to me and asked if I was going to have another lesson after school. Unfortunately it wasn't in the plans but fortunately I had all day free because Ross is at a session in Chisinau so I wasn't going anywhere. She met me at the time we agreed on and was so excited to learn. She was trying so hard and doing a wonderful job.

What I love most about this particular student is her drive and determination to learn. She is that student that has been picked on throughout her schooling. If I say her name, some students turn their noses up and say, "oooh. Yea, that girl." They say she smells and she's weird. I say she deserves another chance. Her parents left her when she was little, and abandoned her with her sick grandmother. She doesn't know how to ta

ke care of herself because no one taught her. She doesn't know how to study because no one taught her. She wants to learn and she's finally taking an initiative to do so. I am so excited that I'm the one she's come to for help!

But those two things weren't the only great things from the day!

Good news 2!!!!!

When I got home from school my NTG was giving a math lesson to some students. They were done shortly after I arrived home, and I went to

go get some lunch in the casa mica. He followed me shortly after and was in a super good mood telling me what there was to eat, and this, that, and the other. Seriously, I've never seen him in t

his good of a mood before! He was so helpful and smiley. Because he had a lot of work to do moving the corn, pumpkins, and squash from the outside of our gate to somewhere behind the house, and my NMG was going to be working in the fields till pretty late, I told them I would make dinner.

I cooked gnocchi because, well, it requires few ingredients and is supposed to be fast. It took me 3 hours instead of 1 because I think I made enough for the entire village of Varatic. It cooled much faster than I expected it to so when I served it it wasn't exactly hot, and for some reason neither was the butter garlic sauce. But my NTG and NMG were both very thankful and happy and they said it was delicious even though it was cooled. We talked throughout dinner and nothing seemed awkward at all- which is a huge jump from the night(s) before. I think I should start doing this more often, especially because NMG is working really hard all day in the fields and I'm sure the last thing she wants to do when she gets home is cook dinner...

TGI(was)F!!